Episode 01 - Génesis

The opening scene:

Meet "La Negra", the corrupt head of security guards leading a herd as corrupt as she.

Meet Regina, she runs the place (or used to), deals drugs and more importantly "owns La Colombiana" I respect her for that. She's now hanging from the ceiling, humming I believe I can fly. No, not really, she's just dead.



And this is what happened 16 hours before.

Cut to a shower scene and all you see are naked women.



La Negra: Who needs a towel?
Inmates: *silence*

Apparently, no one.

Meet Teresa Lagos and her two daughters, Ruth and Andrea.
Andrea (in white) is the problem child and she can't hide it. Look at that arm.
Ruth seems ok but she's young, give her time.
Teresa is a law teacher/human rights specialist/penal rights specialist/judge/lawyer, I can't quite tell. She seems to be many different things to many different people and they refer to her by all those titles. In the end she's just a pretty decent MILF. They are moving to Paris in two days.



Meet Lorena Guerra and her perfect family. A husband and three kids (those who have what they wished for deserve no judging). It's all so perfect you know something bad is going to happen ... soon. Lorena and the kids are going away for the weekend, but Patrick can't go - work - hm hm. So Lorena invites her best friend to go along but guess what, she can't go either, and something smells funny.


Back at the prison we see La Negra giving away all sorts of illegal substances and collecting money from the inmates. Some of it goes to the director, some to Regina and some to "Bambi", working under Regina's instructions. Bambi wants Regina's power ... and she also wants La Colombiana. Who wouldn't.


... And the best part is ... I think she wants her too.


Regina isn't very happy about it. Can you tell?
Oh and doesn't she look much better alive?


Regina and La Negra find out that Bambi had other inmates working for her but she was keeping the money to herself. So they decide to show her who's in charge and during what seems to be a painting class they all gather to attack Bambi, some blood is spilled but no one gets killed and all i got from that scene was this:



I would kill for you too my Colombiana.
By the way, the girl has no name, she really goes by "La Colombiana" (The Colombian).


Meet Santiago and Federico.
Santiago is Teresa's ex-husband and Mexico's City Governor. Federico seems like a flunky of a CEO, the guy who does everyone else's dirty jobs and also an investor and like all investors he wants profit. The guy is now willing to invest on a new private prison, built from scratch with all conditions a modern prison must have.


Santiago, as a governor has the last word and can make the project come to life. But he doesn't seem very interested.

Federico does everything he can to convince him. His idea is to put the inmates working for free and export the products.

?????

Profit.

Santiago says the only way he will accept it is if Teresa (ex-wife) takes charge of Capadocia as a director, which she promptly refuses due to the free-labor policy Federico wants to implement.
Federico, smart guy, then tries to persuade Teresa to take the job. Teresa is not convinced so he has to resort to a much loved last option. Bribing.
We then see Federico meeting with La Negra, bribing her to cause a riot at the old prison. She gives Bambi some shivs and says:

La Negra: Do what you have to do, I will be looking the other way.

And a bloody riot ensues, the first thing Bambi does is kill Regina and when all the other inmates ask "Now what?" she replies "Get la Colombiana". There's nothing like having your priorities straight (haha).

As Lorena is driving with the kids the older one suddenly starts yelling "mi tote mi tote mi tote", apparently they forgot his monkey-shapped-backpack and the only way to shut him up is to turn back, go home and get it. You know children.
When she gets home she finds her husband and her best friend in bed. Remember that funny smell on Lorena's kitchen? Betrayal.

The girls fight and Lorena accidentally pushes her friend down the stairs and she falls dead. The police arrives and Lorena is later accused of murder.

Back at the riot Bambi is now in charge, she has taken some of the children (you can have your children with you in mexican prisons until the age of 4) hostages. She negotiates her surrender and gets the authorities not to kill her.

La Coronela Isabel Clave is running the troops and supposedly the negotiations, but Bambi calls for Teresa Lagos.
Isabel comes across as "very gay", I don't know if it's just me, or wishful thinking (major crush) or the fact that she carries guns, wears tight clothes and runs a team of 3429823498 men. She's creepy and very hot. I like being confused.

Inside:

La Negra: Surrender now and no action will be held against you.
Bambi: Right, I'll get another 50 years, plus the 114 I already have ...
Bambi: (pause) ... how much is that Magos? (talking to one of the hostages)
Magos: 164

That was somewhat funny. But you have to see Bambi's face to appreciate it.

Santiago can't deny what happened and a public conference is held. Federico got what he wanted, Santiago will vote for the private jail. And puts Teresa in charge of the facility and Isabel in charge of security. I like.
Cut to the brand new jail, that reminds me a lot of Emerald City, M city, OZ, only much darker and scarier.

And that's the end of episode 1.